Sorry to all the mothers and fathers of our
generation, if you agree or disagree, truth is: we are not producing quality
human beings.
Maids or nanny are not your relatives, not your
family, why they need to take care of your kids, you may give me the reason as
I'm paying them. Paying good or more money wouldn't help. Believe me your pay hurts them
furthermore, it promotes not to take care of your kids.
You may pay ₹10k or ₹15k or ₹30k. Your nanny or
maids think that this is nothing and you are earning in lakhs, and you pay peanuts to
them. Many other factors influence them not to take care of your kids, many maids
or nanny are poor or need of money, in front of them your show off’s like you
tell your spending on shopping, movies, mobile, hospital, school, so on, that Hurts
furthermore.
They don't take care your kids, do whatever you
want, give whatever you give, just think for a minute? you are the mother or
father, don't have care for them, why your maid or nanny should be more caring
than you.
Why are you earning money, many parents answer is
for their kids, if your kids are self-sufficient enough to live their life,
there is no need of your money.
I remember one of the Telugu movie (Janata Garage) dialogue:
If your kids are qualified and grown they don't need your
money, if your kids are unqualified and grown they may destroy your life time earnings
in 2 days.
Let me remember one of the quote said by Swamiji (Tumkur,
Karnataka): Don't
make properties for the kids, make your kids as a property.
You know why world
producing harmful people, that is because lack of good parenting. That is the
reason we see so many terrorist, thieves, rapists, murderers, so on.
What are the causes of bad parenting?
Answer: Too
much love and Too much negligence
What is too
much love?
Today’s parenting? I personally see, they are very
much lavish in spending for kids. If a baby cries they give Cadburys chocolate to
the mouth, I really confused is Cadburys helping or destroying children?!
Parents are spending 1000’s for kid’s toys and
other things, (they don’t know that finally they play with old bottle caps and
broken sticks) anything they ask, parents provide and they give name as we
suffered in childhood and we don’t want our kinds to suffer like us. This is utter
nonsense idea, I think; since you suffered you know the value of money and now
you can do the job and earn money.
As Shiv Khera said in You Can WIN book: Generally,
children brought up with excessive freedom and a lack of discipline grow up not
respecting themselves, their parents or society, and have a hard time accepting
responsibility.
Example: In
China, because of single child rule, parents started showing so much love and
started satisfying every single need of their children. What happened when they
reached teenage, they started asking bigger things, which parent can’t make it
easily. This results teenager’s suicides, you know why? From the childhood,
they experience only success and satisfaction, they are not trained to handle
failure or lacking, they go depression and dying. Who is the culprit? Its
parenting, again what they are doing you know? Mother and father working day and
night to keep their children alive.
In India, there is no such rule(of single child),
passion of single child is started, (I know the population issue, having 2 or 3
child’s is good instead of producing nonsense one child, in terms of quality) let
me give few adverse effects of single child, now a days we don’t have community
or joint families, this single child grows alone, plays alone, sleep alone,
sing alone, dance alone, so on.
What happens in double or tipple child home, they
fight for toys, they fight for food, they fight for cloths, they joy, they play
together, they sing together, they dance together, they eat together, they
celebrate together, they share their suffering, they learn sympathy or empathy,
so on. With this they learn sharing and caring and living and adjusting with
others.
Whereas single child never experienced sharing,
caring, fighting, suffering, celebrating, so on as multi child growing environment,
obviously this grows as incompatible to the society and communities. If you
have any surveys you will possibly see more: depression, psychopath, suicide,
divorce cases in single child.
Father or Mother don’t say that, I give time to
them, that will be never be equal to child community growing, reason;
generation gap. They can’t enjoy company with you when compared with other children.
Again, if single child growing with community or
joint family, that will be away from in getting: depression, psychopath,
suicide, divorce, kind of situations.
Note: In India many single child parents are suffering in later stages of life. Don’t worry world is so big, many less populated countries are there in the world, they will give space to your kids too, you also know that, many in younger generation are now a days migrating to different countries. Child grown with siblings are more strong and capable to live independently. Don’t give population reason for your laziness or fear. India is bigger than your imagination, don't estimate any country by seeing metro cities crowd, in that case New York in America and Tokyo in Japan also over crowded.
Note: In India many single child parents are suffering in later stages of life. Don’t worry world is so big, many less populated countries are there in the world, they will give space to your kids too, you also know that, many in younger generation are now a days migrating to different countries. Child grown with siblings are more strong and capable to live independently. Don’t give population reason for your laziness or fear. India is bigger than your imagination, don't estimate any country by seeing metro cities crowd, in that case New York in America and Tokyo in Japan also over crowded.
What is too
much negligence?
This is nothing but you are not caring your child OR
spending more time to your kid. Earning father and mother (both) may not be a
good idea, either father or mother one should give up their job,(if you don’t
have community or joint family) reason; child is also like product, as Sadguru
Jaggi Vasudev said; child is 20 years product, you need to take care for 20
year. If not you will be producing wrong or faulty product to the society. In
material products if product is faulty you will throw-out. Whereas your child
it’s not possible, you need to bear with all faults or error or mistakes and
you need to suffer for your mistake in later stages of your life.
You don’t want your child to be produced as faulty
product, please give up your job. Let me repeat Swamiji’s quote: Don't make properties
for the kids, make your kids as a property.
If some
of you might missed to watch how maids or nanny or day care treat kinds, please
watch: (Source from YouTube, note this nonsense not limited to India, you can
find many other countries for the same)
1. Care
taker harassed a 11 months old child in pune:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qy9g1Z98W3s
2. Ten
Months Baby Beaten By Caretaker In Baby Care Centre In Navi Mumbai | Mango
News: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EqInO67qCE
Again: don’t say I fit CC TV/Hidden cam at home,
maids also know how to take away from camera and punish your child.
Sometimes I feel road side sales people and
construction workers are better parents than the Class A employees, reason;
they allow them to grow in freedom and with the nature. Instead of locking them
in room or cage or daycare.
Remember: If child subconsciously affected and
threatened by maids or nanny’s, this will be life time suffering and like Mental retardation,
maid/nanny can influence fear in your child and make them handicaps. Then your
earning will nothing to do with your child. Come out of money, Money is not
everything, spend some time with your children’s, give them what makes them
best (not everything they asked for), avoid what makes them bad.
Don’t use
TV/Laptop/Mobile to control your children:
Now a day’s parents innovated new techniques to
keep children quiet, they just give TV/Laptop/Mobile to avoid them.
1. TV/Computer:
Your children experience sun, moon, rain, dirt, trees, sand, so on virtually,
never experience playing under the real sun, moon, rain, so on. Lack of
physical activities and social networking make them weak physically and
mentally.
2. Mobile: Impacts on brain and nerves, creates so many other problems. As study says; Children use more mobile phone are more emotionally break down and suffer for small or smaller things. It makes emotionally uncontrollable.
2. Mobile: Impacts on brain and nerves, creates so many other problems. As study says; Children use more mobile phone are more emotionally break down and suffer for small or smaller things. It makes emotionally uncontrollable.
Teach moral values to your kids, make the world as
a more colorful, wonderful, peaceful, joyful and healthy place for every single
being on earth.
Let me thank my friend
and colleague Ramasubramanian.T and Mark.B CEO of OpenText, they indirectly or directly
influenced me to write this blog, as I sensed their care and interest in building
better society to the world.
Parents: Stop producing
psychopaths, Start producing quality human beings.
Author: GCV (Vishnuvardhana GC)
Kereya neeranu Kerege chelli
Author Disclaimer:
I’m not a robot to be constant, consistent and complete, I’m a normal human and my blog will be contradictory like director give multiple movies have different opinions on the same subject or different subjects. I flow like a river, I really don’t look for sand, rock, trees, house, and so on. Intention is helping as many as possible before reaching the ocean. I strongly recommend to consult expert’s advice to follow and adopt any methods. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being.