Showing posts with label Children. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Children. Show all posts

Sunday, 12 July 2020

Do not own property for children, make children as property.


Do not own property for children, make children as property.

Corona gives us more time to engage with our children... Here are a few highlights of our engagement.

My two children [daughter 8 years old and son 6 years old] have been able to learn yoga, doing a 12-timed sun salutary [Surya Namaskar] which has 12 Yoga postures in one Namaskar, it brought them a lot of enthusiasm. [Initially they denied, after explaining the benefits, they agreed and now they are happily doing…]
They are also doing Pranayama four times a day and once meditation practice; these have become part of their lives through continuous practise.
I encouraged my children to write and tell stories on 3 things (Ex: Parrot, ant and tree. So on), they are able to create their own stories, I appreciated their narration and stories they wrote.
One hour a day, after my work, I gave my laptop to my kids [not office one, my personal laptop; ... following guidelines] that prompted them to draw a painting. I only showed how to use 3 or 4 features of MS-Paint. It fostered creativity in them. [Attached Art collages]
I told my children to write a picture on 1 object on a paper, gave them a star rating for the wrote. That helped them develop their hand craft/art skills. [Attached minimized pictures of their Art]
They showed us some magic shows, puppet shows, many other creative thoughts and received appreciation for their work. I gave them clay that I had previously brought from farm land (black soil, ಜೇಡಿ ಮಣ್ಣು), and they showed me so many crafts out of it. They are reusing that clay...
We ask them to do small tasks and they are paid for that work. We encouraged them by paying for their work [paid ₹ 10, ₹ 20 for the activity] and also assigned few pots, asked to grow tomatoes, brinjal, flowers, chilli, coriander, grains, and so on and we paid for their products and purchased [paid ₹ 20, ₹ 30]. [this was before Corona times] I did this for them as they need to understood the fruit and vegetable values and hard work behind to get them on our plates as food.

Parenting is…

1. Creating an atmosphere to learn and ability to do the given work.

2. Give them money for small housework or tasks, [₹ 5, ₹ 10, so on] they learn to respect work and money.

3. Teach dignity of labour, as they need to understand all kinds of work is good and important.

4. Instilling courage and confidence to face uncertainties and challenges. [Life is very unpredictable, unknown and uncertain and it’s very dynamic, no defined rules work.]

5. They should understand the value of the things. [I took 6 months to give a small watch. My daughter once begged me for that, when I went to the shop; she was looking at the watch, but the shopkeeper called it ₹ 55, I convinced her as - when I go to the Majestic, I will bring it to you, it costs only ₹25 in Majestic. My daughter was crying, but we came home. 6 months later I gave her the watch, which I brought it from the Majestic. It’s not about money, with God's grace I'm not that poor. she should understand that things take time. Also, its value and importance also.

According to some analysis of teenagers’ suicides, one reason is because of bad-parenting i.e. parents give everything, whatever their children ask in their childhood. When they grow up, they ask for something bigger which might not be affordable to parents due to financial conditions, these kids who never experienced NO, start hearing the word NO and they cannot digest that, which end up giving up their lives. Hence, they need to know the truth that everything is not available or possible in life. Sometimes they should experience NO’s in life.

6. Bring some discipline in children. As Shiv Khera said in You Can WIN book: Generally, children brought up with excessive freedom and a lack of discipline grow up not respecting themselves, their parents or society, and have a hard time accepting responsibility.

7. Don’t try to make your child as your xerox copies, give freedom and allow them to express their creativity, ideas and thoughts. If you observer your life, its not free from any suffering and sadness, so why to create one more suffering being by imposing your idea and guidelines.

Note: Teaching values and discipline, it’s part of brining responsible child to the society. [This is not part of removing freedom]

As the title says, if we raise children efficiently, there is no need to make assets. It doesn't matter how much property you make, for the children who are not properly raised.

Children learn more by observations. So, watch your words and behaviors, they follow your actions not your teachings. Spend one hour with them, it boosts your productivity too…











Author: GCV (Vishnuvardhana GC)


Kereya neeranu Kerege chelli

Author Disclaimer:

I’m not a robot to be constant, consistent and complete, I’m a normal human and my blog will be contradictory like director give multiple movies have different opinions on the same subject or different subjects. I flow like a river, I really don’t look for sand, rock, trees, house, and so on. Intention is helping as many as possible before reaching the ocean. I strongly recommend to consult expert’s advice to follow and adopt any methods. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being.   

Saturday, 26 January 2019

Build to Collapse


Build to Collapse
Every construction must destroy one day. Everyone thinks I am building great and it stays forever.

Nothing on Earth is going to stay forever, it's impossible for someone to build something that stays forever.

Every invention loss its value one day, like programming language Fortran, Pascal, C, C++, and so on. Like operating systems: Win 95, DOS, and so on. Similarly, many great constructions of the history are either destroyed by other groups or by nature.

Kids are building house at beach, using sand. Every kid thinks, this is forever. Next day other group of kids destroy that and build another one, they too assume it is permanent. Similarly, adults are doing the same. Difference is; kids build, play and forget. Adults build, feel, compare and suffer.

Your stay on Earth is like railway station waiting room. Many people write their names on seats and walls in the waiting room. Nothing stays permanent, it stays till others people to get into the waiting room. When others enter, they erase your names, they write their names. This is going on and on. Unfortunately, no one is understanding, what had happened to the earlier things.
Look at the above image those are souvenirs of one generation, now their kids thrown out and brought other things which they feel those are great now! After 20 or 30 years, again their kids do the same. Every thing looses its value after some time, in your childhood you have few toys those are your life, now may be its your mobile, later something else.

Your house may be very beautiful now, in your old age you will witness that your kids will destroy and rebuild their house with their styles and taste.

Look at your house the things you brought and thought those are great and beautiful forever. After few days those things lost their importance and beauty, Now you don’t even noticing their beauty and creativity.

Example; when you are in love with someone, they look so beautiful, once you started hating them, same person looks ugly, reason beauty is not in the things. Beauty is in the mind it makes things beautify or ugly.

Universe is not your house, it's creators house, he organizes and reorganize things in seconds. Whatever you do and build, it's just a quantum leap for him to dissolve.

Only five elements are permanent not forms of the elements. Those five are Earth, Air, Fire, Water, and Space. You build any form out of these, it will not stay forever, one day it will come back to its original form.

Author: GCV (Vishnuvardhana GC)

Kereya neeranu Kerege chelli

Author Disclaimer:

I’m not a robot to be constant, consistent and complete, I’m a normal human and my blog will be contradictory like director give multiple movies have different opinions on the same subject or different subjects. I flow like a river, I really don’t look for sand, rock, trees, house, and so on. Intention is helping as many as possible before reaching the ocean. I strongly recommend to consult expert’s advice to follow and adopt any methods. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being.

Friday, 20 October 2017

Children are dying Parents are Vying

Children are dying Parents are Vying

Sorry to all the mothers and fathers of our generation, if you agree or disagree, truth is: we are not producing quality human beings.

Maids or nanny are not your relatives, not your family, why they need to take care of your kids, you may give me the reason as I'm paying them. Paying good or more money wouldn't help. Believe me your pay hurts them furthermore, it promotes not to take care of your kids.

You may pay ₹10k or ₹15k or ₹30k. Your nanny or maids think that this is nothing and you are earning in lakhs, and you pay peanuts to them. Many other factors influence them not to take care of your kids, many maids or nanny are poor or need of money, in front of them your show off’s like you tell your spending on shopping, movies, mobile, hospital, school, so on, that Hurts furthermore.

They don't take care your kids, do whatever you want, give whatever you give, just think for a minute? you are the mother or father, don't have care for them, why your maid or nanny should be more caring than you.

Why are you earning money, many parents answer is for their kids, if your kids are self-sufficient enough to live their life, there is no need of your money.

I remember one of the Telugu movie (Janata Garage) dialogue: If your kids are qualified and grown they don't need your money, if your kids are unqualified and grown they may destroy your life time earnings in 2 days.

Let me remember one of the quote said by Swamiji (Tumkur, Karnataka): Don't make properties for the kids, make your kids as a property.

You know why world producing harmful people, that is because lack of good parenting. That is the reason we see so many terrorist, thieves, rapists, murderers, so on.

What are the causes of bad parenting?
Answer: Too much love and Too much negligence

What is too much love?
Today’s parenting? I personally see, they are very much lavish in spending for kids. If a baby cries they give Cadburys chocolate to the mouth, I really confused is Cadburys helping or destroying children?!

Parents are spending 1000’s for kid’s toys and other things, (they don’t know that finally they play with old bottle caps and broken sticks) anything they ask, parents provide and they give name as we suffered in childhood and we don’t want our kinds to suffer like us. This is utter nonsense idea, I think; since you suffered you know the value of money and now you can do the job and earn money.

As Shiv Khera said in You Can WIN book: Generally, children brought up with excessive freedom and a lack of discipline grow up not respecting themselves, their parents or society, and have a hard time accepting responsibility.

Example: In China, because of single child rule, parents started showing so much love and started satisfying every single need of their children. What happened when they reached teenage, they started asking bigger things, which parent can’t make it easily. This results teenager’s suicides, you know why? From the childhood, they experience only success and satisfaction, they are not trained to handle failure or lacking, they go depression and dying. Who is the culprit? Its parenting, again what they are doing you know? Mother and father working day and night to keep their children alive.

In India, there is no such rule(of single child), passion of single child is started, (I know the population issue, having 2 or 3 child’s is good instead of producing nonsense one child, in terms of quality) let me give few adverse effects of single child, now a days we don’t have community or joint families, this single child grows alone, plays alone, sleep alone, sing alone, dance alone, so on.

What happens in double or tipple child home, they fight for toys, they fight for food, they fight for cloths, they joy, they play together, they sing together, they dance together, they eat together, they celebrate together, they share their suffering, they learn sympathy or empathy, so on. With this they learn sharing and caring and living and adjusting with others.

Whereas single child never experienced sharing, caring, fighting, suffering, celebrating, so on as multi child growing environment, obviously this grows as incompatible to the society and communities. If you have any surveys you will possibly see more: depression, psychopath, suicide, divorce cases in single child.

Father or Mother don’t say that, I give time to them, that will be never be equal to child community growing, reason; generation gap. They can’t enjoy company with you when compared with other children.

Again, if single child growing with community or joint family, that will be away from in getting: depression, psychopath, suicide, divorce, kind of situations.

Note: In India many single child parents are suffering in later stages of life. Don’t worry world is so big, many less populated countries are there in the world, they will give space to your kids too, you also know that, many in younger generation are  now a days migrating to different countries. Child grown with siblings are more strong and capable to live independently. Don’t give population reason for your laziness or fear. India is bigger than your imagination, don't estimate any country by seeing metro cities crowd, in that case New York in America and Tokyo in Japan also over crowded. 

What is too much negligence?

This is nothing but you are not caring your child OR spending more time to your kid. Earning father and mother (both) may not be a good idea, either father or mother one should give up their job,(if you don’t have community or joint family) reason; child is also like product, as Sadguru Jaggi Vasudev said; child is 20 years product, you need to take care for 20 year. If not you will be producing wrong or faulty product to the society. In material products if product is faulty you will throw-out. Whereas your child it’s not possible, you need to bear with all faults or error or mistakes and you need to suffer for your mistake in later stages of your life.

You don’t want your child to be produced as faulty product, please give up your job. Let me repeat Swamiji’s quote: Don't make properties for the kids, make your kids as a property.

If some of you might missed to watch how maids or nanny or day care treat kinds, please watch: (Source from YouTube, note this nonsense not limited to India, you can find many other countries for the same)
1. Care taker harassed a 11 months old child in pune: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qy9g1Z98W3s
2. Ten Months Baby Beaten By Caretaker In Baby Care Centre In Navi Mumbai | Mango News: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EqInO67qCE

Again: don’t say I fit CC TV/Hidden cam at home, maids also know how to take away from camera and punish your child.

Sometimes I feel road side sales people and construction workers are better parents than the Class A employees, reason; they allow them to grow in freedom and with the nature. Instead of locking them in room or cage or daycare.
Remember: If child subconsciously affected and threatened by maids or nanny’s, this will be life time suffering and like Mental retardation, maid/nanny can influence fear in your child and make them handicaps. Then your earning will nothing to do with your child. Come out of money, Money is not everything, spend some time with your children’s, give them what makes them best (not everything they asked for), avoid what makes them bad.

Don’t use TV/Laptop/Mobile to control your children:

Now a day’s parents innovated new techniques to keep children quiet, they just give TV/Laptop/Mobile to avoid them.

1. TV/Computer: Your children experience sun, moon, rain, dirt, trees, sand, so on virtually, never experience playing under the real sun, moon, rain, so on. Lack of physical activities and social networking make them weak physically and mentally.
2. Mobile: Impacts on brain and nerves, creates so many other problems. As study says; Children use more mobile phone are more emotionally break down and suffer for small or smaller things. It makes emotionally uncontrollable.

Teach moral values to your kids, make the world as a more colorful, wonderful, peaceful, joyful and healthy place for every single being on earth.


Let me thank my friend and colleague Ramasubramanian.T and Mark.B CEO of OpenText, they indirectly or directly influenced me to write this blog, as I sensed their care and interest in building better society to the world.

Parents: Stop producing psychopaths, Start producing quality human beings.


Author: GCV (Vishnuvardhana GC)



Kereya neeranu Kerege chelli


Author Disclaimer:

I’m not a robot to be constant, consistent and complete, I’m a normal human and my blog will be contradictory like director give multiple movies have different opinions on the same subject or different subjects. I flow like a river, I really don’t look for sand, rock, trees, house, and so on. Intention is helping as many as possible before reaching the ocean. I strongly recommend to consult expert’s advice to follow and adopt any methods. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being.